Reflection

“Perfection is a symbol of grace, beauty, hard work, dedication and perseverance, that will always reveal the path of life.” Those words echoed in her mind and felt like a monster gnawing at what was left of a shredded skeleton. The Geisha closed her eyes briefly as she attempted to pass the banks of a garden pond. She was terrified of catching a glimpse of her reflection. The Geisha knew her eyes must be fixed forward with a soft smile as she walked gracefully towards her destination.

To anyone looking on, the woman held her head with pride. She was a servant of the people. When needed to, she would dance and preform to lighten the mood. Outward the Geisha appeared to be full of life and purpose. People would flock to her to have their troubles forgotten, even for a brief moment. The Geisha was silent and kept to herself, giving everything she could to provide for those she served. Her appearance and makeup, flawless. Even her very walk seemed to float gracefully. That was until a tiny unseen pebble laid in her path.

When she stepped forward, her foot landed dead center on the small rock. The Geisha stumbled as her balance was thrown off. With her restricted tight Kimono, the Geisha was unable to adjust her body weight. She fell forward, sliding into the ground as dirt caked her robe and a side of her painted cheek. The woman winced in pain while bracing her shaking arms to sit up; to her complete and utter failure. The lady's eyes caught the reflection. It stared back with a dead gaze. For the first time, the Geisha’s appearance matched how she felt.

The woman sat in fear, unable to move. She dreaded the thought of peering at herself but now couldn’t break eye contact.

“It’s been a while. I had wondered how long you were going to ignore yourself?” The reflection hauntingly whispered. The Geisha quickly scrambled to her feet patting herself free from most of the dirt. Her back turned to the water.

“You can’t hide from yourself, you know this. How long will you fill your world with noise to ignore your own thoughts?”

The reflection’s voice whispered in her ear with a ghostly haunting tone.

“How much time will pass before you admit-“ Quickly the Geisha covered her ears to the imaginary voice in her head “Stop it…stop it..“ her voice cracked. “They are just lies, ones a demon keeps whispering. Lies-” tears swelled as her hand brushed the dirt covered make up on her cheek.

“If the words I speak are lies then face the water! Look deep in your own eyes and tell yourself what the real dishonesty is here.” The reflection’s unworldly voice seemed to stab deep like a knife. The Geisha spun around moving closer to the bank.

“I am worth… I am wort.. worth!!” she huffed, fighting with all her might, staring directly at herself.

“Worth what?” The reflection demanded an answer. “You can’t even finish your own sentence. How pathetic! Look at yourself! Are you worth nothing more than a trained dog? Your only purpose is to work without questions? Tirelessly every day? Do you even feel human?”

“I am… worth-” The graceful posture changed to one of furious anger. The Geisha dropped to her knees landing in the water. Releasing a roar like grunt the woman punched and smacked at her reflection in a hurricane of rage. Water splashed and folded to every pounding fist spraying in all directions. Her makeup started to run from the water that drenched her face. Blow after blow she clawed at the reflection but to no avail. Water rippled and swayed but still revealed the woman’s true identity.

“Worth-less” whispered the reflection. All time stood still. The Geisha‘s fist froze mid air. Even leaves on trees felt to have stopped moving as the pair of eyes stared deeply into each other. Her makeup almost washed completely off. With one swift and painful last hit, she threw all her weight into a single punch and slammed the pond bed under the water. The mud splashed up covering her kimono. She sobbed and brought her soiled hand to her face only distorting her appearance more.

“You are worthless!” The reflection stated softly “You serve others to ignore your own failed life. You hide behind noise to drown out the silence of being lonely. Most grievous of all you can’t seem to stare at your own reflection! You are far too ashamed to feel human, let alone worthy of living.” The clouded reflection solemnly continued “Many found you wanting but in the end not needed... With a fear of being a burden to others, you now find yourself alone with no hope of a future.” The woman shook her head profusely as the voice pushed forward.

“Despite how much you try, it will never be enough! Perfection is just an illusion and you are a byproduct of it’s lie.” The tears streamed down her face.

“ You will never be prefect!! And your best will never be enough. Your failures weigh heavy on your shoulders only breaking your hollow soul more.” By this time all signs of the Geisha had been washed away. All that kneeled before the water was a sobbing, muddied woman.

As the ripples settled and the water became clear, a beam of light directly shown down on the water. The reflection had changed for the brighter with it whispering a question in a almost lovingly tone

“Now that the lies have been washed away, and your failures have spoken of who you are not… Are you ready to discover who you are?”

The sobbing woman looked to the water besides her tightly pulled back hair. The once proud Geisha didn’t recognize herself. All she saw was a broken, filthy woman before her. She didn’t feel worthy of her jewel crested pins on her head. Slowly she reached up removing the pins one at a time. Her long hair trickled down from her bun, touching her lower back. The woman stared at the jewels on the pins, then back to her reflection.

She closed her eyes, feeling the sun's rays fill her cold wet body with warmth. It felt almost like a hug embracing her. The Geisha had felt peace; as her soft hair lightly caught the breeze. Part of her soul felt alive with a peaceful warm fuzziness as she realized there was a spark inside herself demanding for a change. After some time and deep reflection the woman leaned forward with her hand stretched out towards the water. She offered the hair pins willingly to her reflection as they fell to the bottom of the pond. The memory of the Geisha is now deceased; underwater with the pins. She slowly stood up looking towards the sun as a completely different woman emerged from the mud. With a deep breath, almost in slow motion, she took her first step forward towards a renewed life.

…..

I would like to offer a special Thank you to Geno for editing this mini story. And also to you the reader for your time. I very much appreciate it. I hoped that you enjoyed the story